Cruel Blue Nowhere Read online

  When he arrived at Olivia's unit, he put his hand out tentatively, feeling the condensing moisture on the cold steel. When his skin made contact, the vibration began, and he closed his eyes to see Olivia staring at him; she seemed to be standing in a white, empty room, just her alone. Her vivid blue eyes locked into his, and he felt a jolt like electricity hit him, making him jump slightly as he heard her say, "Thank you. You will know what to do when you see my file."

  And then she disappeared, he yanked his hand away and the mist slowly disappeared; he also realized that the mist would obscure the cam view, not allow him to be recorded. As he headed back to the computers, he knew it would only be a few more hours until he could look at that file.

  He only hoped it would reveal what he needed to know, and that he wouldn’t fail Olivia.

  Chapter 12

  Back at his apartment a little after midnight, Ben grabbed a beer. Then thought he needed his wits about him and put it back in the fridge.

  He sat down at the tiny dining table where he'd put the box. For a few minutes, he simply stared at it, wondering if he was really going to do this? Once he searched Olivia's belongings, there would be no turning back.

  Swallowing his fear, he pulled the box over, opened the flaps and took out the heavy file folder. As he opened it, a stack of manila folders spilled out. He picked up the one on top, flipped it open and felt his heart pound so hard it thudded in his ears.

  He was looking at a folder of family pictures -- apparently all taken on the private island. There was an enormous estate, a four-story mansion, verandas and balconies, doors and windows open to ocean breezes. Tropical vegetation bordered the house, palms swaying in the seabreeze, a couple gardeners tending the lush, profuse flowerbeds surrounding the estate.

  The first few pictures were Cranston, Olivia and their child, Samantha. Most looked posed, somewhat stilted, but a few were just candid shots of them around the house, cooking or playing with Olivia outside, laughing, smiling...happy.

  Then he noticed a change in Olivia's demeanor, her expression becoming bland, almost emotionless, and worse, soon he saw naked fear in her lovely blue eyes. Ben picked up the other folders, which mostly contained legal paperwork, a pre-nup, financial accounting. Finally, he saw a zippered pouch, and picked it up, feeling the weight; as he unzipped it, hundred-dollar bills spilled out.

  He gasped, quickly trying to contain the money, stuff it back inside...but then he noticed a note pinned to a bill. He took the paper clip off, and read handwritten words:

  Cranston is not the man I thought he was. Oh, we were happy at the start, even if he was on the cool side with emotion. To make a long story short, he started hitting me and after Sam came along, promised it would stop. But it never did. He didn’t want me to be in cryonic suspension, but I insisted, couldn’t leave my little girl. If you are reading this, it means somehow, some way I was able to find someone to help my daughter, Samantha. This money is for her, and you, whoever you are. I beg of you, please use the photos to help her.

  Ben grabbed the other files, flipping through several until he found a few in a white envelope. Shaking his head, mentally preparing himself for what he was about to see, he finally pulled open the envelope and seeing the pictures, couldn't squelch another shocked gasp.

  Olivia was in a thin t-shirt, holding her arms out in front of her, the skin bruised black and blue up and down each arm. Looked like these photos were taken with her cell phone, as she stood in front of a bathroom mirror -- maybe in a public restroom somewhere. He guessed she couldn't have any privacy at the mansion and had to do this with subterfuge.

  He picked up one photo and saw that her neck was bruised, as if Cranston had tried to strangle her. Flipping it over, he read: "He likes rough sex, and enjoys strangling me almost to the point of unconsciousness."

  Ben shoved the whole mess across the table, some of it spilling off onto the floor. What a creep! A first-rate wife beater, Ben thought, wanting to run, get away from what he was learning. It was sordid, as far from the pretty paradise pictures as you could get. Not only was Olivia being abused, it looked like she was almost a captive on the island.

  Again, he wondered if Olivia had been murdered; that somehow Cranston was responsible for her death, but made it look like leukemia? Was that even possible? Money could buy almost anything, so maybe that was why Olivia's spirit was restless, trying to communicate the danger Cranston posed for their daughter.

  But would he really harm his own flesh and blood? Ben picked up the last file folder, and saw it was pictures of Samantha -- a miniature image of her mother. Long, thick blond hair, the crystal blue eyes, pale, oval face with a sad smile. Was he imagining the sadness in the little girl's face?

  Finally, he picked everything up, sorted it and put it back in the large brown file folder. Hesitating with the cash, he counted it quickly: a couple hundred thousand. And that surely wasn't much in the scheme of things...but Olivia had probably had to somehow collect this cash without Cranston knowing.

  He stacked the money, then put it back in large zippered pouch. He got a beer, drank it down in almost one long gulp, then headed to bed. He hadn't taken a sleeping pill in several days, and at first, reached for the bottle at his bedside. But then, he put it back, feeling the long shift, the eerie experience in the storage chamber and the file information take in a toll in sheer exhaustion.

  He fell asleep almost instantly, and then the dream came:

  The field of flowers beckoned, but now he could clearly see Olivia waiting for him under the fig tree, and his feet were unencumbered as he made his way to her. She said, "I have been waiting for you."

  When he was standing close enough to touch her, she said, "I'm not real, you are seeing my image. My spirit wants to be free. Something happened when I died, when the CPS was started; I was determined not to die. It was as if I left my body, was floating above it, and could see everything. The light appeared, but somehow, I couldn't go toward it...unable to forget about Sam.

  Ben started to speak, but he felt a cold touch on his lips. "Just listen. From where I am, I can see the future as well as the past. A timeless place. Something is coming, something bad is going to occur on earth. I gave you a glimpse of it in one dream, the brilliance, the furious light?"

  He nodded mutely.

  "In five years, there will be a gamma ray burst hit the earth, and it will create terrible chaos. The earth will change, but as much as it will destroy, there will be some survivors. You must go to the island, eliminate Cranston and take care of my child. There is an underground compound there which was created for any kind of disaster. Only you and Samantha will be able to survive; the help, the guards, everyone will leave for their homes when this is known to the public."

  Ben wanted to ask questions, tell her he wasn't capable of this...but found he could say nothing.

  She went on: "Finally, you must destroy my Dewar. I want to go toward the light, but I can't. My soul is captured in this nowhere, a cruel blue nowhere in between death and life. I know you won't let me down."

  He awoke, sweating and disoriented. Sitting up, he let out a groan of despair, unable to believe the dream. And yet, deep down, he knew it wasn't a dream: it was Olivia's last message to him.

  Wondering if he was up to the task, Ben fell back in the bed, numb with fear and the weight of knowledge about the calamity that would befall humanity in the future.

  Chapter 13

  Ben walked into work in a daze. He couldn't afford not to show up, especially since he had to remain employed to carry out Olivia's request to free her from cryonic suspension. He nodded to Candace, then went into the security office, seeing Tom pivot to ask, "Hey buddy, how's it..." his words ending as he got a good look at Ben's face.

  "I know I look like shit, no need to tell me." Ben leaned against the wall, said, "I had a shitty night, couldn't sleep. You asked if Carmilla had contacted me, but she hasn't. I was wondering if you think she would take a call from me?"

  "
I don't see why not. She hasn't found a job here, but still wants to move." Tom stood, got his jacket and shrugged into it. "Buddy, meet me at the bar when you get off. I think we should talk."

  Ben agreed, watched Tom leave and then sat down in the desk chair, his eyes going to the monitor in the storage chamber. He stared at Olivia's unit, shuddering at what she wanted him to do. Even though he was by no means sure the bodies in suspension could ever be brought back to life, at least they had a chance. And destroying the Dewar would be certain death. Yet all this was pointless if the calamity she'd told him about was going to destroy parts of the earth.

  Last night after the dream, he'd pondered the legal ramifications. Perhaps it would only be abuse of a corpse? Or some other minor charge? Of course, he'd lose his job, and Oglethorpe would be livid. And that was something Ben didn't want to happen, because he'd decided the only way to save Olivia's child was if he could somehow get a position in security on the private island. Certainly, he would be qualified; but that wasn't the kind of job that was advertised. He'd have to figure out a way to maneuver into that private security detail and could not afford to honor Olivia's request until he had that job lined up.

  Putting his head in his hands, he felt a serious headache throbbing behind his eyes. He was so confused, and frightened and depressed and desperate. The five-year window gave him time to prepare and do this in an orderly manner, but right now, he was anxious and scared about the future of the world and humanity. How did one deal with this knowledge?

  Or was he merely going mad, insane? Wouldn't there be some indication from government if such a planet-wide annihilation was on the horizon? Wouldn't astronomers alert people? Maybe not, since it would only create chaos and utter panic, the very fabric of society tearing into shreds as people went nuts knowing many lives were about to end.

  Ben pulled his laptop across the desk, opened it and did a search for any anomaly in astronomy circles, finding not even a hint of something that vast and devastating. He desperately wanted to disbelieve what Olivia had told him in the dream.

  What about his mom, he wondered. Was she being warned in advance by Olivia? Did he dare discuss this with Tom? His mom?

  In the end, he decided to talk to his mom about it, and planned to call her the next day. When his shift ended, he met Tom at the bar, and they had a drink, discussing other employees, scheduling, random stuff until Tom said, "I know you went into the basement alone."

  "Huh? I don't know what.... Oh right, I changed the cam in there, it was defective."

  Tom shook his head. "Don't lie. I did the February cam stability building wide check the day before you went in, so I know that's a lie."

  Ben shrugged, ran a hand over his head. "Fine. I did it to get inside the basement, just curious what was down there since I'd only been down once..."

  "You went in the vault. You didn't know there's a hidden cam in there, did you?"

  Alarmed, Ben grimaced. "Damn. Should have known that."

  "Look, I'm not going to report you and I deleted the footage. But you need to get Olivia Masterson's material back in there before someone discovers it's missing. Are you still having the strange dreams?"

  Sighing, Ben felt it was useless to continue lying and said, "Yeah, and more. There was a letter and pictures in her file that showed Cranston Fillinger beat her. She had left evidence, and a request for someone to get her child away from him."

  "Really? Jesus. What are you going to do?"

  "I was thinking maybe, one way or another, I could get hired with Cranston's private security, confirm what was happening. But I have no idea how to go about that."

  Tom rubbed his chin, drained his beer and said, "I might know someone who could help you get that job. But here's the thing, if Oglethorpe suspects you of subterfuge, he will go ballistic. And he's already disturbed by a couple things you've done."

  "Tell me about it. I was afraid he was going to fire me last week when he called me in his office. I dodged a bullet there..."

  "Ben, look, is that all you are concerned about: the child's safety? Is that all you learned from the file?"

  Looking Tom in the eye, Ben said honestly, "Yes, that's all." And that was true, so far as it went -- because that was the only request in the file. The other information had come from the dream -- a potential earth destroying event and Olivia wanting to be set free.

  Taking a deep, relieved breath, Tom said, "Do you still want to see Carmilla? I think she really liked you. Truth is, it would help you to have a relationship."

  Seeing Ben squirm, Tom went on, "Listen, I know you still miss Sophia, you told me how much she meant to you. But a relationship would ground you, get you away from this depressing place. Working here is no picnic, even if it seems quiet and undemanding. The fact we are in a facility with a bunch of corpses weighs on your mind."

  "Does it bother you?" Ben asked, staring intently at Tom's face.

  "Yeah, I had to adjust to the place when I first came here twenty years ago. But there was only about twenty units then, and I needed a job. The difference is I had Judy, and soon, kids. Whatever my reservations with the place, I had to provide for my family."

  "I see. I never thought it would bother me at all, yet as time went on, I got to thinking about spiritual beliefs, what happens to the soul or even if there's a soul...stuff like that."

  "I think everyone who works there has at some point had those thoughts, questions. But to balance out your life, you need outside interests, other friends. Carmilla is a nice girl, and she told Judy she likes you. Or if you just can’t hack it, I’ll look into helping you get on Cranston’s security detail."

  "Go ahead and see what you can do about that. In the meantime, I'll call Carmilla tomorrow sometimes. Hey thanks for meeting me, I know you have to get up early for your shift."

  They stood, Tom clapping a hand on his shoulder. "No problem, kid. You want me to put the file back for you?"

  Surprised, Ben hesitated a few moments, thinking. Then he said, "Nah, I'll slip it back tonight sometimes."

  "Alrighty then, catch ya later."

  Back at his apartment, Ben made copies of the abuse photos, putting the originals back in the folder. If he needed to use these as leverage in the future, he'd have the proof. Keeping the originals would be better, but he couldn't risk getting fired right now.

  Trying to get to sleep, he wondered if there was a way to free Olivia's soul in the future instead of sabotaging the Dewar soon? Could he come back here later, after he'd secured a position with Fillinger's security detail? For now, he tried to let the troubling thoughts fade away as he finally fell asleep.

  * * *

  And yet, the next morning he found himself going through the file again. He sat at the dining table, sipping coffee and searching every document, each piece of material, though what he was looking for he didn't know. Only that he awoke earlier feeling that something was 'off' about this entire situation.

  He stood at last, began packing everything, including the cash, like it had been when he first opened the file. As he bent to pick up a picture, his gaze fell on the floor and he saw the edge of another picture underneath the fridge. He fished it out, looked down at the picture and sucked in a big breath: it was the missing photo of Olivia.

  But it was different: instead of the surroundings like the prep room, it showed her sitting in the vault. Her expression was still sad, her head covered with the same scarf, looking the same as he'd originally saw the picture. Or was this another photo that had slipped out of the file? That didn't make sense though, because he'd never found that first picture and her features were the same as that first one, only the background different.

  He slipped the photo in a cabinet drawer and closed the file folder. He was so confused, feeling like someone or someTHING was jerking him around. No proof of anything, other than Cranston's abuse. Could he really trust what had come to him in a dream?

  By noon, he decided to give Carmilla a call. When she answered her cell, he sa
id, "Hey, sorry I never called. This is Ben...and I was just wondering..."

  "Yes?"

  "If you'd like to maybe take in a movie Saturday night."

  Only silence, just a hint of her breathing.

  "Or we could do something else. Tom tells me you are thinking of moving here..."

  "Yes, I am. But not yet. A movie sounds good. Will you be in Denver?"

  He was surprised that she accepted, and rushed to say, "I'll drive down Saturday, check in with my folks and then pick you up around seven o’clock."

  She gave him her address, and they ended the call.

  Ben desperately hoped this would get his mind off the craziness of his wild speculation and the paranormal phenomena.

  Chapter 14

  Ben sat across from the beautiful Carmilla, her long dark hair casually styled; her brown eyes focused on his, but his mind was wandering. They were in a Denver Starbucks, having a treat before the movie.

  He had arrived at his mom's house around one and had a late lunch, his mom telling him she continued to have the strange dreams. Ben honestly wanted to confide about the coming menace, collapse of life as they knew it, but just couldn't bring himself to give her that information. What were the chances she and his dad would survive it anyway? Zip, nada. Why upset her.

  Later, he picked up the lovely Carmilla and drove to Starbucks. And now she asked, "Are you okay, you seem distracted."

  He said, "I'm thinking of changing jobs."

  "Can't say I'd blame you. That cryonics place gives me the creeps."

  Ben wanted to say something but found himself agreeing. And as he gazed at her, he heard himself say, "I've had a strange experience there."

  She leaned forward, receptive. "How so?"

  And just as he was about to tell her, there was a loud alarm, the staff swinging into action, shouting, "Fire alarm! Everyone out, now!"

  They were herded out into the parking lot, a safe distance from the building. Firetruck sirens screamed in the distance getting closer and closer. He felt Carmilla moving close beside him, and her warmth felt good -- it had been so long since he'd felt this wonderful human physical connection. He put an arm over her shoulders, said, "Wow, sorry about this."